How I got started thinking about ‘building community’: Morgan Autism Center

The answer is simple: I experienced a loving, real, and vibrant community.  And it happened when I least expected it…

When my son, Jeffrey, was about 9 years old, we were told that he would need to leave our local community school which could no longer accommodate his special needs .  Jeffrey’s needs are involved, especially as it relates to his safety and happiness.  He has very significant developmental delays, which are evident in his speech and language, his impulsive and at times self-injurious behavior, and in his difficulty in focusing on a task.

Now that he is 15 and nearly 6-feet tall, I still describe him as a mix between a Curious George and Forrest Gump — and more of a Curious George in a 6-foot body!  His endearing qualities make him a magnet for others, and his unique perspective and sense of humor are so pure that you can’t help but feel that his joy is contagious.

However, it wasn’t always this way.  While Jeffrey was in his ‘community’ school, it was a constant effort to get others to appreciate the value he brought to the world.  There were exceptions to this rule, such as his 1-1 aide, Elvia, and his first grade mainstream teacher, Mrs. Scatena.  Both of these remarkable woman will be life-long family friends.

When I was first shown Jeffrey’s options for a new school, I was sad and scared that we’d lose all sense of community.  How could Jeffrey and our family thrive in a special school that was a long drive from our home?  Also, seeing all the children and adults with developmental needs in one place was overwhelming at first.  I couldn’t picture Jeffrey there, and it felt so stark and intense to me.  I saw cubicles for the children to work within, and I didn’t see the fact that I myself was putting up a wall and not seeing what was really there at the new school campus.

Fortunately, we had many mentors in our life: Deb, a teacher at Morgan Center; Pam, an ED at another school; Dr Parker, Jeffrey’s developmental pediatrician, and OT/speech therapists like Monique and Amy, and my sister Tracy too.  All of these phenomenal mentors helped us take the step and trust that it would be a good one for Jeffrey.  And thank goodness we did.

Now, when I see Jeffrey and every other student or adult at the Morgan Center, I see a loving, caring environment that truly brings out the best in each individual.  I’ll never forget the story about Giancarlo who learned to ride a unicycle at Morgan Center, and it was Brad, the current ED who taught him how.  Everyone at the center has his own ‘unicycle’ story; something that is uni-que to him and that the teachers have helped bring out in them.  Each has not just one teacher, but every staff member at the school looking out for him and giving a sense of a loving community that creates a net for success — that lifts up the students to be their best and ensure that they will be caught if they fall in any way.

Several years ago, I was asked to come up with six words to describe myself.  The words have evolved to this:  Build Community, Bring out the Best.  This is the gift that Morgan Center has given me — to see what is possible and to figure out ways I can help enable community and personal growth for all.  I am starting with Jeffrey, and seeing how what I’m learning with him can be spread even further.